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Appreciate the Value of Initiation, Part 3 of 7, Aug. 25, 1995, Hamburg, Germany

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I don’t know what initiation really means to you, but it means a lot to me. It’s not that you sit there, listen to instructions, and you’re still struggling inside [on] whether I’m worthy for you to accept as your Teacher, or if this initiation is worthy for you to accept. It’s not like that. It’s a one-in-a-million-years’ time chance. […] I have no intention to bind you, or to keep you, or to do anything to you physically, mentally, psychically, at all. I just stand by as a very unconditional friend.

I think you meditate. It will be better for you. And then all the answers will come. The less you meditate, the more questions. The more you meditate, the less questions. That is my experience, as well as everybody else’s experience. Sometimes, just because the things we know before and the things we know today at initiation are different, so our mind, the brain, the computer, doesn’t like to accept, saying, “Wow, I hear different. I know different. Today you say different things. How come?” So, that’s why we have often problems. But later, no more, later, no more.

Where is...? Is she there? Yes, here, here. When she was first initiated, this is what she told me. If I’m incorrect in any way, you correct me. She told me that before she was bad. I don’t know how bad she was. What she meant is she had problems and struggles – many kinds. You know, we human beings do all have, like inside struggles and fighting with ourselves inside. And then also a temper. But she meditates more and more and more, with group meditation especially, and now she feels good. She knows she has progressed. So, the new people, just take it easy. Alright? Meditate more and then you will know everything. You don’t have to ask me anymore. Mostly when you see me, you just smile, or we just eat together, or drink coffee together. We don’t come for questions and discussion anymore, but we come just to enjoy each other’s presence. Mostly after some time, it becomes like that.

It’s not that all the questions will be written on the blackboard for you, and all the answers are there. But you just know. Inside, there’s intuition, and you feel very satisfied, very happy, that you have no need to know, even if the whole world opens before you, you don’t feel curious. It’s OK if you don’t know. That is the time when you know. That’s why the ancient Saints, They say, “The one who knows is like the one who’s ignorant. The one who knows does not speak, does not discuss, does not argue. The one who argues is the one who doesn’t know.” Now we are still stuck with all kinds of names and forms, so, we really have problems, but later on, everything will be clear. Otherwise, I would be the one who sits alone here, and all the disciples would be running around somewhere else already. Not that ten years later, they still stick around, and happier and happier, and more and more convinced each day. That is the proof.

It’s not that I give you anything. I don’t give you money. I don’t give you any help. Of course, some, one or two, when you’re really in trouble, then we help. Just like we help anybody else outside in this world who are the children of God. But it’s not that I buy you with my money or with anything at all. So the more you meditate, the more you’ll be sure of your path, of yourself, and the more happy you’ll become, and then no more questions, really. After a few months, you’ll already have less questions. Even if you ask me a question, you already know. Sometimes you just want to catch my attention. That’s for sure. Mostly the Chinese. They already know, but they just want to ask so that I look at them. Oh yeah, Mr. X or Mrs. E is there, things like that. But they know. You get what I mean?

So, I think you just meditate for a while. Now you have too much brain here at the moment. I don’t feel that the atmosphere is very good. I feel some of you are very restless. Is the time to rest or time to meditate? Eating now, right? Is it eating time? What is the schedule? (Yes, it is eating time.) No wonder, I think now they concentrate on the solar plexus. Instead of on the crown chakra, they concentrate on the solar chakra. It’s a little bit restless at the moment. I’ll see you in the evening, if you want. You meditate a while, and then you’ll calm down, you’ll feel much better.

Initiation is very good, but sometimes too powerful for you to digest at one time, so you feel sometimes restless, too much. And some people already have been initiated, and they wanted to meditate quietly, but then there were instructions and sitting and all that going on, and they also felt disturbed. That’s why originally, I thought we had to give initiation before, like from seven to ten or eleven (o’clock), and then we meditate together. In that case, it would be better for you. Or normally I’d say, don’t give initiation now. When you first come you’re still restless – packing, camping and all kinds of things, and parking and all that. Still not used to the environment. You feel a little bit aggressive; everybody would, on such a journey, or excited because they want to see the Master. So, the atmosphere is a little bit not very peaceful, but in the evening, you’ll feel better, the new and the old ones.

So now, I think I let loose the energy. Get out and eat something, and digest the power that you assimilated today. And then I’ll see you in the evening. Is it OK? (Yes.) I changed it. Originally, I thought, first you meditate together, and then in the evening you get initiation. But then many people already expected and gave me pressure, inside. So, I thought, OK, never mind, never mind. I let it be. And you are not the only one that feels a little bit restless and a little bit agitated. Me also, every time before a retreat or before initiation, and after initiation.

OK, OK. Sit down, I’ll talk. I’ll tell you something, to the new initiates. I don’t know what initiation really means to you, but it means a lot to me. It’s not that you sit there, listen to instructions, and you’re still struggling inside [on] whether I’m worthy for you to accept as your Teacher, or if this initiation is worthy for you to accept. It’s not like that. It’s a one-in-a-million-years’ time chance. I don’t know how much it means to you. But you should know how much I have to do, before and after your initiation. It’s not that you sit there, and then still wondering whether you should stay with me, or you should go. You stay, you go – it’s your problem. It’s your right, your choice. I have no intention to bind you, or to keep you, or to do anything to you physically, mentally, psychically, at all. I just stand by as a very unconditional friend.

Whenever you need me, you come. Should you decide to go, you go, if that is all the initiation means to you. It’s like you go shopping. Because your mind is so bad, it cannot recognize what is the difference between a true diamond and glass. Therefore, you struggle. Therefore, you ask so many “sharp” questions. But you don’t know what it means; you really don’t. At least, at the time you die, you will know. You will know what initiation means to you. At that time, no one is around you. No one can accompany you. No money can buy you power. No position can protect you from hellfire. At that time, the Master is the only one that comes to you. Then you will know. So, guten Appetit (good appetite)!

I tried to see if [there was] anything beautiful in Hamburg, but was very difficult to find. We rushed back on time. If they don’t come in now; they cannot later. Close the door. Nobody comes in anymore. They should know what time to do what. Is it difficult here with toilet, bathroom, everything? No. Two hours, from four to six. Is that enough? (Yes.) Is that not enough (time for) bathroom and toilet for you? Is it OK? Everything OK? (Yes.) So, you should be on time, really. Already 25 minutes past six. Right? There’s no more excuse to stay, hang around outside.

When I was here the first time, this morning… no, this afternoon, four o’clock, there were many people hanging around outside talking, or playing with the children’s see-saw, or something like that. That’s the way you do retreat? And then when I came out, they complained that my “bodyguards or guard body” didn’t let them in. Is it their fault? (They’re not disciples.) They’re not disciples? (No.) Then why should they hang around here? (They were family.) (They are disciples.) No, they were disciples with the badge. Is that the way they do retreat? Is that the way you do retreat? Who was there before? Raise hands. You remember yourselves standing outside or not?

Is that the way you do retreat, ladies, gentlemen? You know time is very short; you know how far a distance I come here. You know why I came here? Or you don’t know? And do you know why you came here, or you don’t know? If you don’t know, God help you. You don’t have to come. That’s why you have so many problems. I don’t mean you, these people.

Whatever you do, you should do it wholeheartedly, then you’ll get the whole sum result. Otherwise, you get nothing. Understand? Even during initiation, if you just sit there and think of your past master, your past Buddha, or your past whatever, then you get nothing here. And then you ask me why you don’t have (experiences). And then you wonder why you came here, wonder if this is right or wrong for you. You will continue to wonder all your life, if you do things the way you do. And no one can ever answer you enough. Your time is very valuable, as well as mine. If your time is not valuable, my time is. I don’t have time to run around on buses and airplanes for fun, just to come for you so that you just see me whenever you want, and then hang around, and then go Spaziergang (stroll), and then do anything you want. And then come and complain that you get nothing, that you don’t know why you come here, why you sit here, why you do this and that and others.

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