The Germans want me to go to Germany, the Austrians want me to go to Austria. The Spanish want me to stay here for at least a month to learn Spanish. […] Everywhere is very beautiful, but it’s not easy to buy a big place where it is nice, and you feel at home – something like that.
So many German people? I am touched. So many have already left? Wow. (Yes, maybe they had to leave Germany.) Yes, for the best. To learn German again. Only one month. (Yes, it’s only one month.) Now I have... (One year would be better.) One year better. Ha ha ha. So I’m going to Austria and have a home. In Germany, not only you but many people also have a lot of money now. In Germany, right? (No.) 450,000 – that is a lot. No? It is not enough for you? What more do you want? How much more do you want? You can buy some nice land, buy a farm. Not in the city, too expensive, but some distance away. (Black Forest.) Black Forest? (Yes.) Why the Black Forest? (Because it’s warmer than in the north, but so far away.) (It is so far away from Munich.) (Munich is too cold.) Munich is too cold. Black Forest is warmer? Really? (Yes, 5 degrees warmer than Munich.) Oh!
“Chiemsee is better,” she said. Even warmer? (At Lake Constance.) Lake Constance is better? (Expensive.) Expensive? (Yes.) Which one is best for all German people? Which place? (Eastern Germany is cheap.) Eastern Germany? Is cheap? Very far? (Yes.) I don’t mean at the ends of the Earth. I just mean a bit further from the city, so it’s not so expensive. (Duisburg. Freiburg. Duisburg is in the middle of Germany.) Yes, but do we have people there? (Yes.) Sixteen people? Two? (No, there are 50 of us. 60? We are 60.) Oh, you’re still growing. More than 60? (Yes.) (Just a while ago it was 60-something...)
Do you have a map of Germany? (Map?) Map. No? (In the car.) In the car? I know that. Is there someone here who can go get it? Bring it and then... Which (meditation) Center is currently the largest in Germany? (Duisburg.) Duisburg? (Yes.) How many rooms do you have, for how many people, how big and is there a garden, etc.? (We have three floors, each 120...) Three floors? Ah, is that what you said? OK. (Yes.) (Yes, we have three floors of 120 square meters each. Then we have a big basement and an attic, and a small backyard.) Oh, backyard? How big? (Not very big.) Very big? (Not very big. It’s just for eating.) I didn’t hear that. What do you use the backyard for? (Eating.) Eating. Ah! (Same as here.) Like here? We don’t have a backyard here. (Yes, but I meant we also eat in the small yard outside. It’s the same with us.) OK. You call that a yard? (But our place is more beautiful.) How beautiful? Why beautiful? (We painted the wall.) Painted? (A mural. On the wall, we have the sea...) One of you is enough. (Yes, we painted a mural on the walls – all of them.) You painted it yourselves? (Yes.) Well, then I’m not coming.
If you did it yourselves, then I won’t come. OK, painting and then what? Trees? (There are no trees.) No trees? Why? (Big city.) In the city? (Yes.) Can’t you plant trees? (Yes, but only a few.) A few, OK. A few bodhi trees – just a few, yes? (Yes.) Bavaria tree. What? (It’s in an industrial area, Master. The surroundings are not so nice.) But she said, “So beautiful.” I almost believed her. (Naturally, our Center is beautiful inside, but the surroundings are not like in Austria, as you described it, with the lake and all. In our case, it’s not like that.) Ah, OK. Austria – that is a health resort, you know. People go there to relax and recover. There is a bigger hotel, but it’s not for sale. It’s even nicer. (Our Center is the lotus flower in the mud.) The what? (The lotus flower in the mud. (The lotus flower in the mud.) Ah, OK, OK. Understood. But that’s very positive for nothing.
So where is Duisburg? (Master, we have the Omega map. Because they only use this map when traveling.) Understand, understand. Because they go to many countries. Where is Duisburg? Where is Germany? Germany, here. Dresden. Duisburg somewhere. Frankfurt. Nuremberg. Duisburg, so small. You can’t even find it. Oh, so small. That’s not in the middle. (Almost.) Yes, Freiburg. Freiburg or Frankfurt. But Duisburg is here. You’re closer to the lake. Maybe four hours, then we’d be there. Yes, but then you have to drive through Amsterdam. (But if we are in Duisburg, then Holland, Belgium and Luxembourg can also join us.) Yes, of course. What do you say? (Over there are six very beautiful lakes. Six lakes.) Oh, really? (Yes, it’s like swimming in the ocean – a lot of fun.) Is it close to our house? (Yes, it is close. By car, it takes about…) Fifteen minutes. (Yes, if we drive.) It would take three hours on foot. Very close, very close. (Yes, it’s far if we walk.)
(So in Duisburg, there are six areas, six lake areas. They are very close to us – only half an hour at most by car.) Only half an hour? Then we should go to Austria, and we’ll have it very close by. There are six lakes, but we don’t see anything. That is the problem. (Or go to Austria every three months.) Yeah, any place. No matter where, it’s always too far – far for him or far for her, but beautiful everywhere. Europe is very beautiful. You can’t live everywhere, so what to do? You can’t have a Center everywhere, right? For what? (I don’t know, but Freiburg is in the center of Europe.) You think so? No. (Yes, it is. Because France is here, and here is Switzerland and Austria.) Every citizen thinks that their country is at the center of the universe. (Turn it around.) Really? I can’t read German, that’s why. Where is the center of Europe? Duisburg is here. That’s not the center, Mamma mia! Take a look! That is… That is in the middle if you count England or Ireland. Here is the center – maybe Austria or Hungary. They are in the center, no? Austria is also in the center. Austria, where we are. OK, here.
(So that is Salzburg. Here is Freiburg.) Freiburg. You know, I once thought that Northern Germany was a bit cooler in summer. So I wanted to buy something there. There’s a castle with... Oh God, I can’t speak German anymore. What is “river?” (“Fluss.”) A river beside it. And they wanted €1,200,000: a big one, four rooms and such. “You can also get to the lake via this river,” they said. Connection. So I said, “Oh, very nice, very nice. Can you tell me when we can visit it?” “No, I cannot. But tomorrow my colleague will come. I’ll let him know then. He’ll call you.” I waited till the next day, then the following day, the day after that – nothing. Then I called the woman again. She said, “Oh, my colleague didn’t call you?” I said, “Not at all.” “OK, he’ll surely call you tomorrow.” Next day, the following day, another day, the day after that – nothing. So what’s that supposed to mean? That means I shouldn’t go to Germany or what? (No.) (Not there, but to Duisburg.) Only that. Duisburg? There. Here.
(Or You can buy an island, Master.) An island? (Yes, for all of us. So many islands.) Where? But are they selling? (In the Mediterranean.) It’s not always that easy. Yes, but you have to swim. But after the long swim you will be dead tired. You won’t be able to sit anymore. (Maybe we can look for a place near the object where You have already bought and then we have...) (Does it have to be in Germany? That is also in Austria.) Doesn’t have to be in Germany, but you want to be in Germany – definitely in Duisburg even. (But if it were meant only for 200 people...) Yes, in Germany, perhaps. In the north, maybe we could buy a larger piece of land. Because it is still... (Very windy. Very cold.) Windy. Cold. (It gives you a headache.) Ah. How do they do it in Denmark? It’s still farther. Yes, even more headaches than in Northern Germany.
How do we do it, then? The Germans want me to go to Germany, the Austrians want me to go to Austria. The Spanish want me to stay here for at least a month to learn Spanish. (Maybe Freiburg is an idea after all because...) Where is Freiburg? (Near the Black Forest.) Black Forest. Salzburg. Munich. Augsburg. Freiburg. (Because then several countries could go there: Switzerland, France... In one hour they could go by train and so on.) Is there someone in Freiburg? (Yes. Near Freiburg...) Ah! That’s why. We’ll take the Black Forest. Another small Center. That is why they want us to buy, to become bigger. Everywhere is very beautiful, but it’s not easy to buy a big place where it is nice, and you feel at home – something like that. Let’s buy an island, so beautiful but occupied. Yes, the most beautiful ones are all occupied, and the ones that are not beautiful are not. You can’t… Many mosquitoes. Cannot live. If you want to start a place, there’s a lot of work. In the beginning, it’s a lot of work. You must provide your own electric line and build a house and a boat. And if someone can’t swim, that’s not so good because the boat is not always reliable. You know that? Then you first have to learn to swim. And for these old ladies and gentlemen, they stay in Duisburg.
That’s not always easy. (What Master thinks is the best, then maybe we could go with five people each.) But not in Germany. But please not in Germany. It is so cold. (Do You need a large property?) As big as possible. I also have someone... (How about Italy?) Italy? Why Italy? (Italy is nice and warm.) Italy is warm? (In Croatia, there is a brother.) Yes, Croatia. There are brothers everywhere. Yes, yes, OK. Germany. Duisburg, my God. One can hardly read anything... almost cannot read. There? But it’s a big city, right? (Yes.) Oh. Wow. Bigger than Munich! I don’t believe it. Look at that – Munich so small, yellow. White. (It is an industrial area. In the Ruhr region.) Ruhr region. Not that nice. I would like so much to be on the coast. (On the right side of Denmark, there’s a coast where everyone is welcome.) Where? (To the right of Denmark. It is called Fehmarn Island.) Denmark? (To the right of it.) That is very cold. (Very cold.) What did you say? There is an island? (Fehmarn Island.) Where? Show me. Here. But that’s at the North Pole. (North Pole.) More or less. You can walk to the North Pole. (Too cold.) (You don’t want to go?) (No. Not at all.) After I met him, I don’t want to go to Denmark. Please.