When I lived in Hong Kong, they asked me to move several times. I had a tent which was very big. When I just got there, it looked grand, but just after I lived there for half a day, he said, “Master! You have to move. Typhoon is coming.” Then he took down my dome immediately. Moreover, he made the dome very complicated. He made it in the shape of eighty diagrams. […] It was actually fun to live there. I had to move again after living there for half a day. And moved back the next day.
Hong Kong, huh? OK, enough, enough, enough. Enough. My ego has grown very big. If it continues to grow, you have to leave the stage. There will be no room for you to sit anymore. So this is… Are there any “worse” people? Why are all Hong Kong people here? Are you all from Hong Kong? Most of you? All of you? (No.) No? (Hong Kong, Singapore.) Singapore. Mainland? Where are they sitting? Oh! Dare not look. I’ve told them to put those from mainland and Âu Lạc (Vietnam) at the back. Why you are here? Strange. How come Taiwanese (Formosans) also sit here? Strange. OK, fine. Then we can speak Chinese more conveniently. Is that OK? (Yes, OK.) I don’t speak Cantonese. You are very pretty. Master is very pretty. OK. Is there anything to tell me? No. Dismissed.
Long time no see. (Long time no see, Master.) Whom are you married to now? (No.) No? Then how can you sit here? Oh! You’ve saved his life. Be careful. His name is Xiao (small), but his ego is very “big.” Be careful. How’s everybody? (Good. Hallo, Master.) How’s Hong Kong now? How is Hong Kong now? Is it good? (Good, for the time being.) Good for the time being? (More or less the same as before.) More or less the same as before. Wow! Great! Then, I can go back there and stay for a while? No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Don’t talk nonsense. I have places to stay everywhere. Why do I go back to Hong Kong for? Its name is Hong (fragrant) Kong, but it’s stinky. Too many people, and not enough gutters. Is it still the same now? (The same now.) Yes. It’s good that you still can go abroad. Not bad.
Are there any questions? I am asking Hong Kong, not mainland. Don’t say it. Strange. When I speak Chinese suddenly, I don’t know what to talk about. Do you have any questions? (No.) Except inviting me to go to mainland and Âu Lạc (Vietnam), you can ask anything. As long as you don’t cry and make a fuss, you can make any performance. You can put on a play. Why are you looking so good now? You look better. Have you dressed up? (Yes.) Yes. You did? (A little bit. Applied some lipstick.) Only some lipstick? But she looks very good. Better than before. (Thank You.) Except that the hair is a little gray. Similar to me. And then? Is there any other change? Do you still have the tent up there in Hong Kong? Do you have to take it apart whenever a typhoon comes? It’s very difficult to live there. I don’t want to go there. You have a home today, but tomorrow when a typhoon comes, everything will be gone.
When I lived in Hong Kong, they asked me to move several times. I had a tent which was very big. When I just got there, it looked grand, but just after I lived there for half a day, he said, “Master! You have to move. Typhoon is coming.” Then he took down my dome immediately. Moreover, he made the dome very complicated. He made it in the shape of eighty diagrams. It is already very complicated if people make it look like eight diagrams. He made it look like eighty diagrams. Oh! It was so difficult to take it apart. And there were so many insects there. There were so many caterpillars. They were everywhere. As long as I stepped out, I kept brushing them off. Walking and brushing. It was actually fun to live there. I had to move again after living there for half a day. And moved back the next day. I lived for a half day and it also took him a half day to take down the dome to move. When I was going to move back, I had to wait for at least another half a day. Sometimes he couldn’t set it up correctly. The Eight Diagrams became the Seven Diagrams. It looked very awkward. Those I still remember. Therefore, when they asked me to go back to Hong Kong, I said, “No, thank you.” I said no.
Even it was like that, there were also people who came up to make a lot of noise. Every day, there were people coming to exercise, stretching their legs and talking loudly. Remember? They spoke so loud. I was scared every day, thinking they were quarreling. But it was not. I asked the attendant, “Hey! Why are there people quarreling every day?” He said, “No.” He said, “People in Hong Kong talk like this when they are happy.” I said, “How come they talk like this when they are happy?” If you need translation, take it yourselves. You need translation? Go get it. I said, “My God! They are like this when they are happy, what if they are angry…” “If they are angry, we will be in trouble.”
There were also a few dog-people there. The people and dog-people were all happy. When they were happy, all of them were happy. The people and dog-people “barked” together. Once… I didn’t know who the lady was… A grandma went out and was bitten by the happy dog-person on her behind. Strange? Why could he bite people when he was happy? I said, “Strange. Didn’t you say the dog-person… those dog-people were happy? They normally only bark, how come he bit you today?” She said, “He is happy today, but he was too lazy to bark. Because he was too lazy to bark, he kept his mouth open all the time. Then I happened to pass by him, and he closed it. After he closed it, he was too lazy to open it. So, after I went back and checked, I could count there were more than 10 bite marks of his teeth.” I said, “You are so old, so please don’t venture into the places where the ‘happy’ dog-people stay in the future.”
The people and dog-people in Hong Kong are really special. They bite everything when they are happy. I like them so much. You all remember this. I didn’t lie. I didn’t. (No.) It’s true, a true story. Oh, my God. Is that grandma still alive? Over there. Ah. Yes. I have an eyewitness and physical evidence. I didn’t make up the story. It’s too bad that you didn’t bring the dog-person here. I have an eyewitness but don’t have the physical evidence. But the marks on her behind must still be there. Strange. Strange. I felt strange. I thought about it for several days, but I couldn’t understand at all why the dog-person would bite the old lady when he was happy. There were so many people going up and down there, but he bullied an old lady. I comforted her and said, “It’s alright. Maybe he wanted to have an affinity with you.” Is the translation OK? Do you understand what I am saying? Those who are not from Hong Kong. It’s hilarious.
You Hong Kong people are very special. Really special. You talk like you are quarreling. Dog-people would bite when they are happy. And they still want me to go back to live there. I don’t like that kind of happy atmosphere. Strange. They could be happy anytime, but they all chose to be happy and talk very loudly in the early morning when we were meditating. After he spoke loudly, the whole country would wake up. However, at least in Hong Kong, we didn’t need an alarm clock. Every day they came up to exercise and woke us up at around 4 or 5AM, didn’t they? Every time when we were in deep Samadhi or sound asleep, he would speak loudly and the whole province would wake up.
OK. Do you have any questions? Don’t let me be a clown here. OK? You finished laughing? Then you can leave.
How many groups like his kind? How many groups are like this kind? How many more? (Maybe Âu Lạc [Vietnam].) Only Aulacese (Vietnamese)? Then we stay here, please, stay here. I originally wanted to see you leave, but I heard that the Aulacese (Vietnamese) would come up. I said, “OK. You can continue to stay.” It’s alright. I am like this when I am happy. Meditate on the (inner Heavenly) Sound. Don’t listen. OK. Even this you translate. You even translate when I blow my nose! Oh my God. OK. You really don’t have questions? Need to be more serious, otherwise, you won’t become Buddha and it’s troublesome.
What? What’s that for? No, no, no. Not over there, please. Here only. It’s too far over there and you need to walk. The Aulacese (Vietnamese) can come tomorrow. Till I become stronger. Today we have a good laugh. If they come up, we will cry. We will be affected. I said the Aulacese (Vietnamese) can wait until tomorrow because now we’re just having a good laugh. If they come up, we’ll cry.
You really don’t have questions? OK, OK, OK. Then we can meditate. Have you meditated? (Yes.) You have. OK. You can continue to meditate now. There is nothing to be serious about. Now you’re not fellow practitioners, are you? You’re now all “comrades.” I don’t identify you. We’re all fellow practitioners. There’s no such world of “comrades.” (We don’t want to be comrades.) Don’t want to be comrades? (No.) How come? Now we’re comrades. Can’t run away. Oh my God. It’s more relaxing to meditate like this. Right? Is that OK? OK. Good. Turn off the lights before we start crying. Happy times don’t need to be very long. When they get long, the ending will be different sometimes.
